This is my daily dose of pills...it's quite a bit. Munching them down, I can ingest them rather quickly, so that's not really the problem. Actually it just takes a while to count them out each night. That's all, and it's just something else to have to break out at meals when I'm out on the town (which rarely ever happens by the way), and I wonder what every pair of eyes that glance at my pill stash (equivalent to that of an old man's) thinks when they see me pull the massive container out. Maybe I really am the equivalent of an old man now. I mean I like the way they dress, so...
This is how I got my sutures removed (the doc who did it was Portuguese and a bit on the hilarious side). It didn't hurt that much, but it did take a while. Josie was there to document the process through photography (somehow, someway it makes me feel like the whole thing is happening to someone else, and it's my job just to record every bit). He had some rather hilarious surgical tales, though (I don't feel right repeating them here. They were rather confidential). I know I'm sorry. Let's just say it involved older men having their foreskins removed and a doc passing out during the surgery. It kept me laughing the whole time to say the least.That being said, it was a bit unusual. I feel like I've gotten so used to having these surgeries that it's happening to someone else. The fear and dread I felt before have vanished into this vague sense of comfort that I truly question during my hospital visits. I mean I'm almost friends with my neurosurgeon now (the picture of the interview below), and I don't really know how I feel about that. Life is so different now than it was before. I have a focus. I have something that must be done in order for me to continue my existence. It's almost comforting...in a really bizarre sort of way. I really don't know how to make sense of it all. I feel like I was kind of searching for some bizarre sort of tether to the ground, and this has fixated me to it. I'm no longer vaguely meandering through life. I have a new list of things that need to be done, that I need to accomplish before the end. I didn't feel like that before. It was all just...meaningless?
This is my interview with Dr. Quinones. It went so well (and I had coffee made from this futuristic coffee machine that made a perfect cup one cup at a time. I'll probably never taste that again, but then again, who knows???) I felt great afterwards. Goliath and I is up and running now, and I'm feeling good about it. Rachel's excited about it (she's a writer that's helping to guide me through the writing process), and I am too. My next interviewee is Sarah, but first I have to transcribe my interview. That'll take a while, a long while. Hopefully, it'll go as smoothly as possible.After my interview, Josie drove me up to Philly where I saw some friends (many of which I haven't seen in a ridiculously long time), and Cloud Minder finally got our album entirely planned out. Now we're in the final phases of editing and mastering. We're expecting the release sometime this summer. Almost 2 years without a show...I feel like I need to add some kind of explanation to the album. Needless to say, its has taken on a much more meaningful feel throughout the last 2 years. It's almost like a story of the whole experience now. I don't know if it'll ever actually be complete.
Now I just have to get through the next 6 weeks of radiation which starts tomorrow. Tonight is the first time I have to take chemo (Temodar) which I'm rather uncomfortable with, but if I can do 3 surgeries in a year and walk out of the NCCU, I guess I can do anything???
