Pages

Friday, June 25

One day down, 364 more to go...

Well I've discovered today that starting chemo makes my lack of driving ability seem less frustrating as I'm tired (even when i wake up from a nap). This isn't nearly as bad as I feared, so it's a good thing...? Hopefully my tiredness will lend itself to higher energy levels in the days and weeks ahead, but as for right now, I have no desire to do anything. My mom, my niece and I are heading over to Borders to stand around and look at books, and I find myself seriously questioning whether or not I can actually do this. 

So I think I need to back up first for a minute and explain some things. I've convinced my oncologist to put me on a dose-sense plan of Temodar. It would seem (according to an informant who is a long-term survivor of Glioblastoma (GBM) that people with negative values on their MGMT tests (done to test the effectiveness of Temodar at Mass. General) actually seem to respond better to Temodar when on this plan. So my plan goes as such: I take 250 mg/day for 7 days then I take 7 days off, repeat. So this schedule will have me on a smaller dose for more days/month. Instead of being on a 5 days of 28 schedule I'm on 7 and off 7. 

Well now that I look back, I'm sure I could've stated all this info much more concisely (and probably much less boringly).

So I think in the coming months ahead, it remains truly important that I'm not totally out of it for half the month every month (especially when I'm in school). Though I'm sure that many people have been through much worse, it's still not a very pleasing thought.

Wednesday, June 23

Seizures: can they cause anything good?

So...I'm stuck in the Atlanta suburbs with no way to drive. It's just me and my bike avoiding terrible traffic, trying desperately to get around. I wish, I really wish that I never would've had those seizures...life really bites right now. I can't get around. I have to wait for my friends to pick me up, or even worse, my parents have to give me a ride. "Hey there twenty-nine year old wanna feel like you're back in high school again? Well here you go. That's just too bad." Ugh. 

So I'm starting to go crazy. I have to get out, get around or do something to feel my age. I'm taking classes at a Tech School, and although it's good that I'm doing it, it's still something that people much younger than I do. AHHHHH! I just need to let off some steam, but I have no idea how, when or where (or maybe why???).


I think this is actually worse than all the cancer crap that I've been through. Is that possible?