Yep this is the mask that squishes my face (and head bumps) into place everyday. I don't think I can even open my eyes much sometimes. Monday was really tough. I guess my head was so swollen that the mask barely fit. It was ridiculously uncomfortable. I almost told them there was no way I could handle it, but I made it through...somehow. I talked with my doctor afterward (Mondays are see-the-doc days), and she said to try squishing it down with some gauze that I wrap around my head. That would actually keep some of the fluid from accumulating under my skin. Sounded like a good idea to me (albeit rather gross, if it was happening to someone else and I was reading about it). So now I'm a gauze-wearing freak of nature. It actually does feel kind of nice though...strangely. It was the same when I was in the hospital (I can't believe it's been over a month since the surgery now). It's like I don't quite have to worry about my brains falling out of my head (I think I just reminded myself of Peter Jackson's Bad Taste). It just kind of holds it all in place. I think it's kind of my secret security blanky. Twenty-nine and still holding on to a security blanky...nice.
This is the massive radiation machine that orbits my head (literally. it can turn itself totally upside down). I get six doses of radiation each day. The circle at the top rotates around my head. There are these long lead leaves that the machine uses to administer the radiation to a very specific area. The leaves block the beam from being out of place. (In case you're wondering, it's called IGRT/IMRT). I do it for 6 weeks/30 business days. Then I take a month off and start the "maintenance" dose of chemo. The name of which I find hilarious as no dose will ever get higher (due to toxicity limitations) than on the maintenance dose. I'm pretty sure it's actually high dose chemo (let's just call it what it is). That's it. That's my all to brief discussion of the St. Joseph Radiation Treatment Program for you. I hope you've enjoyed it. Thanks.
