It looks like I will have had quite a few day ones along this trip. This is just another. I went to my Atlanta oncologist to start my chemo program last Friday. I went in at 9:30AM and didn't leave until 6 PM. That's almost a full workday of being pumped full by Saline solution, Decadron, anti-emetics and the three chemo agents I mentioned above. After 7 solid hours of chemo-impregnentation, I felt like my soul had been dissolved into that toxic solution. Now I know this sounds cheesy or a little over-dramatic, but believe me, it's not. I left there with no desires or feelings towards anything--just a strange vacuity in the soul department that was ever-present. It was like living through an entirely median dream with no desire ever to change or leave. Then waking and feeling nothing regarding it. It was the opposite of fun in my mind.
My vision keeps getting worse. Lately, I've had quite a bit of double vision. My brain can't quite reconcile the two images that my eyes are receiving--so I just see both. I'm wondering if I should even be driving to class on Tuesdays at all right now. Or more importantly, if I should even be reading a book (that's getting harder and harder to read) for a hybrid course (half in class, half online) which at this time, I know zero about when anything's due. You'd think in a hybrid course, this would be made fairly clear at the beginning. But being that the syllabus isn't even clear about when things are due, I'm not getting my hopes up.
Monday, September 17
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